Statistics clearly point out the leaning towards an aging
population and coping with elder care and loneliness will
become a concern for many of us at some stage in our adult
years. Possibly a phone call from a anxious relative or neighbor
will force us to confront our parent's changing condition
and our own accountability for helping them.
These days so many women work or lead active lives away
from the home and support is not offered to elderly neighbours,
by the running of errands and chatting, as it used to be.
If your parent's is suffering from loneliness, either because
of loss of a loved one, or moving away from friends, the
first thing you must do is talk to them about their needs.
Its possible they are anxious, fear losing independence and
are unsure what the future holds. Reassure where you can
and discuss what else you may be able to do to help.
Also, you can ask friends to call, but keep in mind, simple,
practical things like fitting a phone with an amplifier.
Perhaps your parent could initiate a friendship by taking
in parcels or deliveries, or baby sit occasionally for a
young working mum.
What about a pet? Animals can provide an elderly person
with loyalty, companionship and love and need looking after.
We all know the value of having something or someone being
dependent on us feeling needed. Considerable thought will
need to be given to the type of pet according to how much
care and attention it will need and the weekly costs. Charitable
institutions like Help-the-Aged have a free information sheet
on pets to help you and your parent make a choice.
If you have relatives or siblings ask for their support,
just what can they do to help as well. Find out what the
community can provide in the way of hot lines, transportation,
meals-on-wheels, and community center activities. A day center,
class or club where they can meet like-minded people or perhaps
helping out for a few hours in a local charity shop. The
church may run social clubs or coffee mornings. The church
can also provide an opportunity for you parent to make an
important contribution to the community and there's no age
limit here.
There are usually local schemes whereby the young and the
old learn together, school base activities involving numeracy,
history and literacy or working with children in hospitals.
Cherish the time you have together and remember engaging
with older parents can be hugely rewarding for you as well,
and maybe an extra visit or two from you each week will give
you both greater insight into who you are and uplift you
both.
